That’s why I laughed out loud when I read that Nigeria is “re-branding” to shed its corrupt image. Re-branding? Do you really think the slogan “Nigeria: Good People, Great Nation” is going to make me forget that your citizens scam Americans to the tune of $1 million per day?  Let’s face it, President Umaru Yar’Adua, Dateline Undercover is like American Idol for your citizens!

Hey Nigeria, how about ruthlessly pursuing those d-bags that keep sending me emails about the $20 million locked up in some hoaky bureaucratic red tape but I can have 15% of the cash if I send them my social security number, bank account, and some of my DNA? Until then, we’ll stick with your old slogan: Nigeria: Posing as Somebody Else Since Email Was Invented!

Carry on, Citizens!

Bonus Material: Most commonly heard motivational taunt by coaches at Special Olympics practices this week: “Come on you guys, you’re playing like the Obama Administration!”

Even more amazing is the fact that he has 170 children!  That’s one more person than my entire graduating class in high school. Unfortunately for Mr. Bello, he lives in a part of Nigeria that observes Sharia law and authorities have ordered the serial groom to divorce all but four of his wives.

Either way, this guy is going to come out of this looking like Rocky after 15 rounds with Apollo Creed. If things stay like they are, he will be celebrating a birthday or an anniversary every 2-3 days. No man can survive that kind of pressure. If he complies with the government, he’s going to have 82 divorces. If he wasn’t living in a hut before, he will be after that!

Carry on, Citizens!