Why? That’s about all I can muster after this story broke. A North Carolina high school student has legally changed her name to cutoutdissection.com. It seems that the former Jennifer has issues with animal dissection in science class. I suppose I can respect that, but changing your name to a web address?  Isn’t that a little extreme?
After thinking about the long-term ramifications of her decision, I’ve come up with some other domain names she should snap up quickly and redirect to herself:
IAmTotallyUnDateable.com
MyJobProspectsJustEvaporated.net
WhyDontIGetInvitedToParties.org
HaventLaughedInSixYears.com
IHopePetaHasAHealthPlan.org
Feel free to add some of your ideas!
Carry on, …

Today’s post is a follow-up to our story from March 4, 2008. In that post, we reported on the retirement of Nepal’s Living Goddess (she was 11).  Apparently, the career of a living deity is pretty brief in Nepal (think dog years).
So today, the government declared a new Living Goddess. The new Maoist government sidestepped 239 years of silly -err I mean serious tradition by naming the Kumari instead of letting the high priest of the monarchy do it. Government apologists might argue that there technically is no monarchy anymore, …

I really thought I was going to miss Al Gore running for President. Over the years he has given so much comedic material to people like me that I thought there would be nothing to write about. However, Obama vs. Clinton got snarky, the DNC flirted with a cat fight, and John McCain throws everybody a curve ball by selecting Palin. Yet, Gore remained the champ for campaign kookiness. Or as George Costanza once said, “please, a little respect. For I am Costanza, Lord of the Idiots.”
But moments later in …

Several months back, I was walking to the parking garage at Circle Center Mall. I had just finished recording Red Shield Radio (You didn’t think we actually got up that early on Sundays, did you?), and witnessed something that really turned me off.  Obama supporters were registering homeless panhandlers to vote.
Now, I always suspected that a homeless person might have other more pressing needs than let’s say… a voter’s registration card! Call me crazy, but I think food, shelter, health insurance, and a job might just be higher on the …

We have an exclusive announcement for the loyal Citizens!  A major 3rd Party Candidate Announcement will be posted to CarryOnCitizens.com tomorrow.  We’ve scooped all the major networks on this one. Check back tomorrow.  Brian Groce will post a time in the comments section of this post.
Carry on, Citizens!

In a stunning proclamation during his Democratic Convention acceptance speech, Barack Obama promised to end one of America’s greatest injustices. Overlooked by most of the media as they dissect his energy, tax, and foreign policies was a nod to one of the causes I have championed tirelessly for years on this blog. It’s time for the Citizen’s to rejoice, because Obama will overturn the most evil policy faux pas of the previous administration.
That’s right. He’s going to end Interleague play. No longer will fans be subjected to the Reds vs …

Ok, I’m over this nonsense. Put them on the steps of the Capital Building and let them Rock, Paper, Scissors for the White House. Best two out of three. It makes about as much sense as the way we do it now!
The American taxpayer paid $29 Million for the two conventions. Why? They didn’t add anything to the debate and the nominees were already decided.
Speaking of the debates, what a bunch of vanilla squirrel vomit! Badnarik was on the ballot in 49 states and …

This is in no way meant to disrespect our President, but Dick Cheney spilling his water on President Bush after the State of the Union Speech was classic comedy. I?m very surprised by how few people actually noticed it. The network I was watching captured it on camera, but the announcers were too busy commenting on the speech to notice. Only one other person in our office noticed it.
Yesterday, my sister-in-law held the phone up to her crying 2 month old baby. Riley, stopped crying as …