So tonight I watched the President talk about the debt ceiling. Then John Boehner gave a rebuttal. If someone told me I would have to watch the two of them every night, I would weep openly. Of course, America didn’t have to be subject to this. I hate to say I told you so, but I told you so. In 2008, I gave you the outline of my plan to eliminate the National Debt. Rather than listen to me, you put your faith in Democrats and Republicans. Silly voters. So, …

I was just shamed by a fan for not writing a Derek Jeter/3,000 hit post. Not just shamed, derided. Maybe even taken to the woodshed. So, I Jeff Stanger officially apologize for not writing a Derek Jeter post last week. Or any posts for that matter. It was an interesting week. And without further adieu, here is some dieu on Derek Jeter. (Remember, you asked for it!)

… but you can shoot a dead Camaro. Well, except in Arizona, where they frown on that sort of thing. It seems that Lauriano Lawrence Lovato, frustrated by the alliteration of his name and the fact that his car wouldn’t start, shot his car. Twice. Both shots went through the windshield and hit the dashboard.

One day, an enterprising young man decided to host a tweetup. He walked proudly into his kitchen and announced to his wife, “I’m going to host a tweetup!”
“What’s a tweetup?” asked his wife.
“It’s a social event, where people mix and mingle and tweet for hours. And, they share a hashtag,” he answered.
“Umm, you’re married now. The only person you’re sharing a hashtag with is me.”

Nature (and apparently college football) abhors a vaccum. And a vaccum is exactly what the BCS Committee created yesterday when they vacated USC’s 2004 Championship. However, being the civic minded person that I am, I’ve declared a new BCS Champion for 2004. Somebody beat Oklahoma, right?

That’s right, you read the headline correctly. Apparently there is an elicit tap dancing shoe market. Not only does it exist, but it’s an international crisis! North Korea is trying to buy tap dancing shoes on the black market. Undoubtedly this is some sinister plot by Kim Jong-il to enslave hundreds of thousands of children to a lifetime of dinner theatre. Or worse, maybe he intends to create a nation of Uber Tap Dancers that invade the talent shows of the West and inflict dominance one click at a time! I shudder …

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I got an email from Target today. They appear to be really hurting for beauty expertise, because the subject line reads: “Share your beauty tips for a chance to win sweet swag!” Hmm… what do you think would cause Target to attempt to bribe me to share my beauty tips? Should I cave in with simple swag, or should I hold out for money? More importantly, do I even have any beauty tips?

ESPN is going to roll out another 30 for 30 Documentary this Sunday night. The subject will be Michigan’s Fab 5. Since the Wolverine’s were big rivals of my Indiana Hoosiers, I had zero love for the Fab 5. In fact, I used to have a picture of Devo posted at work with the caption “The Real Fab 5.”
Who was the greater Fab 5? Let’s compare:

If you’ve read this blog with any regularity, you know my brain is a little… how shall I put this… off. As such, strange things pop into my head and I feel compelled to explore them. Tonight being no exception, I wondered what it would be like to have to market classic works of literature via twitter. It would be a little challenging because you only have 140 characters. You have to get right to the point.

According to Wikipedia (and they’re never wrong), the average U.S. male lives to age 78. That’s freakin’ me out! I’ve already lived over half my life and I HAVE NEVER ATTENDED A WORLD SERIES! Of course, I’ve never had the opportunity to see IU play in the Rose Bowl either. Guess which is more likely to happen.