by Jeff

About Jeff

Jeff Stanger is an author and fundraising consultant as well as the answer to several obscure trivia questions. He writes for food and occasionally for spite.

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Here are my most recent posts


I go back the The Salvation Army tomorrow. Much weirdness to follow.

Sebastion seems to have been placated by the news that I?m planning a trip to Omaha if the Canes go to the College World Series. How serious is baseball to Miami. When the current coach came to the school to interview for the job, he noticed that the CWS Runner-Up trophy was being used as a doorstop. In Coral Gables, the only trophies that matter are the ones that say National Champions. If only I could demand that sort of excellence from myself?

Roxy got some more page time today. Maybe she?ll have a book of her own someday.

Joe Morgan’s Sideburns

Day 5

Work on the novel was derailed yesterday by an emergency grant project. I?ve written 3 CTF grants in my brief grant writing career. The first took me 20 hours. Yesterday I did it in 5. Omissions may have occurred.

Sebastion is still filled with scorn. Today, it seems to be directed at the Joe Morgan bobble head doll. Sebastion finds his 70?s style sideburns particularly infuriating.

The book is growing out of control. My revised outline now includes 26 chapters. There were only 16 a week ago. Of course many of these chapters are not even started. Must foreswear sleep. The newest Wolf prank is devious and delicious.

The Scorn of the Ibis

Day 4 of writing in relative seclusion:

Sebastion the Ibis keeps talking to me. His scorn is pervasive. I must find a way to distract him so I can get some work done.

Tuesday I introduced the most bizarre set of characters yet in this novel : The Gay American Celtic Troubadours. Only the final battle in Return of the King comes close to the G.A.C.T.’S battle with the Volunteer Librarians of America. The passage on beer will get me lauded or sued. It could go either way.

I’m in a raging battle with my apartment complex. They gave me a package Monday that they had sat on for 7 months. They told me it came in last week -as if I wouldn’t figure that out. I used the UPS tracking number to determine it had been signed for it on May 21, 2003, by someone named Ray. I’m certain Ray is a Minion of Gozer.

Carry on, Citizens!


For Larry Stoute 1946 – 2003

The sky now divides
To bring you back into the fold
Welcome home
Still my need to recognize
Any comfort you may show
Only grows
Guess I’ll learn to accommodate
While my heart just sits and waits
Maybe God you found
Maybe is all that you can offer now

Where am I to take refuge
When the storms of pain release
Shelter me
This blessedness of life
Sometimes brings me to my knees
I call on Thee
I have not the words to write
A Farewell to you tonight
Maybe God you found
Maybe is all that you can offer now

I know hearts are weeping
While your voice is now singing
On high, angel on high

I have not the words to write
A Farewell to you tonight
Maybe God you found
Maybe is all that you can offer now

–E. Rowland

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