10 Reasons Why It’s Better to be a Citizen than a citizen
30 August 2011
One Comment
- Citizens are impervious to vampires, zombies, and Jehovah’s Witnesses.
- Citizens read Carry On, Citizens making them smarter, happier, and better at game shows.
- If Godzilla sees a citizen on the street, he will blast them with his atomic breath. If Godzilla sees a Citizen on the street, he most likely will buy them a beer.
- Citizens are often followed by cartoon woodland creatures.
- Citizens smell like Cinnamon.
- Citizens instinctively know how to curse in French.
- When a Citizen gets a tattoo, it’s in 3D.
- If Jack Bauer were a Citizen, he would only need 23 hours.
- Citizens who follow @jeffstanger on Twitter can win random free stuff!
- The Citizen t-shirt is probably the coolest thing you will ever own.
Carry on, Citizens!
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About The AuthorJeff Stanger is an author, talk show host, professional fundraiser, and the answer to several obscure trivia questions. He writes for food and occasionally for spite.
BONUS REASON: Citizens always serve their Medina funky and cold.
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