10 Reasons Why It’s Better to be a Citizen than a citizen

  1. Citizens are impervious to vampires, zombies, and Jehovah’s Witnesses.
  2. Citizens read Carry On, Citizens making them smarter, happier, and better at game shows.
  3. If Godzilla sees a citizen on the street, he will blast them with his atomic breath. If Godzilla sees a Citizen on the street, he most likely will buy them a beer.
  4. Citizens are often followed by cartoon woodland creatures.
  5. Citizens smell like Cinnamon.
  6. Citizens instinctively know how to curse in French.
  7. When a Citizen gets a tattoo, it’s in 3D.
  8. If Jack Bauer were a Citizen, he would only need 23 hours.
  9. Citizens who follow @jeffstanger on Twitter can win random free stuff!
  10. The Citizen t-shirt is probably the coolest thing you will ever own.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Carry on, Citizens!
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by Jeff

Jeff Stanger is an author and fundraising consultant as well as the answer to several obscure trivia questions. He writes for food and occasionally for spite. Google+

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