As we countdown to kickoff of the Colts/Saints Super Bowl, I thought this might be a good time to reflect on those great moments in Super Bowl History. I’m not talking about touchdowns or interceptions or any of that stuff. I’m referring to the great moments that we all share while watching the game. And believe me, there are many more great moments watching the game. It’s a simple mathematical reality. There are only about 100 guys with uniforms on who could conceivably play but there are over 100 million of us watching the game. So without further adieu (as this is an adieu free blog), here are the 5 Greatest Moments in Super Bowl Watching History.

5) Super Bowl IV- The Scandinavian Culinary Society of Greater Duluth creates a likeness of Fran Tarkenton using lutefisk and food coloring. Although the Vikings went on to lose to the Chiefs, the sculpture is believed to be the only truly great use for lutefisk in the history of mankind.

4) Super Bowl XXV- Watching the game from a hostel in Bulgaria, the members of Milli Vanilli correctly spot that Whitney Houston is lip syncing the National Anthem. Ironically, the media claim they were tipped off by anonymous sources, which by 1991, Milli Vanilli were.

3) Super Bowl XXVIII- Absolutely convinced that the Bills couldn’t possibly lose 4 Super Bowls in a row, Sidney Munson of New York vowed to drink a combination of wing sauce and beer via a bong. When it becomes apparent that they will lose to the Cowboys, he loaded the bong with three Natural Light Beers and a bottle of Extra Hot Buffalo style wing sauce. Munson successfully downed the mixture but was not able to control the IBS episode that came with in seconds of the last drop.  The party hosts sent him a bill for the subsequent carpet and upholstery cleaning.

2) Super Bowl XXXVII- Living up to their respective teams nicknames, Raiders and Buccaneers fans stage the worlds largest sword fight in the lobby of the San Diego Omni. As they were using real swords, 97 fans went to the emergency room. No one died, but the combined total number of stitches matched the combined total yards in the game: 634.

1) Super Bowl XXXVIII- On the way to the bathroom, in a small house filled with people watching the game on smaller than 30 inch TV, and over 20 feet from said TV, I glanced back over my shoulder just in time to see Justin Timberlake expose Janet Jackson’s boob. Nobody believed me, for none of that crowd was even watching the halftime show. And for twelve hours, I felt like the man who had the courage to say, “yes, I’ve seen Big Foot.” But as dawn broke, the news of Nipplegate (as it came to be known) spread across the land. I was vindicated.

Carry on, Citizens! (And go Colts!)