Reader Poll: How should I express my midlife crisis?
17 April 2008
13 Comments
Today I’m putting you, the reader, in control. I recently turned 40, and I was informed today that I was supposed to engage in some sort of midlife crisis behavior. Apparently, I missed that memo. I’ve been giving it some thought, but haven’t come up with anything good. So, I thought I would put it to a vote.
Should I:
- Buy a sports car.
- Get a tattoo.
- Die my hair blond. Or brown. Or orange.
- Quit my job and wander the country taking pictures of doormats and living off vermin.
- Devote myself to the advancement of prosthetic limbs for armadillos.
- Run for president.
- Start the movement to get President Taft added to Mt. Rushmore.
- Write a screenplay.
- Other.
Let me know what you think.
Carry on, Citizens!
About The AuthorJeff Stanger is an author, talk show host, professional fundraiser, and the answer to several obscure trivia questions. He writes for food and occasionally for spite.
9
Perhaps my answer was too obscure. What I meant by that was:
9. Other
Or, if you aren’t in the mood for that maybe you should try:
1.2: Get a tatoo for your car.
2.7: A tattoo for your hair?
4.6 Eat only the limbs of vermin. . .and replace with prosthetics?!?
A tattoo of Tattoo…on your rear.
Tattoos are too much of a norm now… like getting highlights or chin implants.
Okay, so chin implants aren’t THAT common now.
I say, write a screenplay. I could definitely see Kansaska as a movie. And whilest doing that (I like pretenting to be British once in awhile – hence, whilest), you could let your hair grow, eat vermin – but not armadillos (they are considered vermin in Texas – well, not really), start that movement and take funky pictures…. Perhaps while doing all of that, you could keep a video blog and post them – keeping the rest of us utterly amused.
Who says you have to have a midlife crisis at 40??? =)
Melissa,
Chin implants? I’ve never heard of that. I must write a post about chin implants.
Get a butt implant…and get a tattoo on it.
9. Other – Llama farmer.
Perhaps I watch WAY too many medical shows…
Yes, chin implants. They are all the rage in California, where people are never quite perfect. I watched an episode just recently where a nearly perfect looking man thought he needed a nose job and a more striking chin. At first I thought he was crazy. He looked like a Ken doll. But afterwards, he did look ‘nicer’ – okay, even MORE like a Ken doll, but he said he wanted it because people in Cali are so vain and he wanted to fit in. LOL
Scary thing is – they do have some sort of boo-tay implant – and I know lots of men who could benefit from that…. =)
Oh – and they have calf implants too! For people who think that they can’t get defined enough looking calf muscles. Again – how silly is that?
I do have to say – most of these are done by men. In California. With highlights.
9. Other (blog more) and install the Democracy WordPress plugin so people can actually vote live! =)
[...] will give out a t-shirt every Monday. This week’s Star Citizen is Melissa Frye for the “Chin Implant” comment. What will they think of next? Anyway, Melissa wins her choice of a Kansaska t-shirt [...]
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