Naming Stuff Part Deux

17 September 2007 3 Comments

There were a lot of responses to my post on Friday about naming your cars. So, I wanted to ask if you have ever named other gadgets, furniture, rooms, etc. in the past. For example, my friends Mike and Angie once added a new piece of furniture to their kitchen. They weren’t sure what to call it. It wasn’t a baker’s rack or an island. So they weren’t quite sure. Knowing that my mom is an interior designer, they assumed I might have gotten some sort of decor DNA.

“Jeff, what would you call this piece of furniture?” they asked.

I stared at it for a few moments, and then imparted my wisdom. “Bob. I would call it Bob.”

For the rest of the time they owned that house, they called it Bob. I’m glad my mother never reads this blog.

Carry on, Citizens!

About The Author
Jeff Stanger is an author, talk show host, professional fundraiser, and the answer to several obscure trivia questions. He writes for food and occasionally for spite.

3 Comments »

Matt said:

A slight (and slightly disturbing, in hindsight) variation on this concept is a name for…

…an imaginary family-member.

Growing up, my family had an imaginary member (named “Fred”) that was blamed for anything wrong in the house (or nation – or world). Many times the collective answer we gave for why – we needed more towells, or we were late to church, or needed to return a purchase, or the restaurant was closed – was: “Fred did it.” All six of us knew without question that this meant: “The real answer is too long and painful (and insignificant to the desired outcome) to be given – it is far better for all of us to just blame it on Fred.”

(Oddly enough, my grandfather was named Fred – there were some close calls when he was around and believed we were blaming him for all kinds of trouble. I don’t know why that was the name we picked – it really didn’t have anything to do with him.)

But giving a name to this concept made life far simpler. I think the reason so few families have stuck together is that they don’t have a Fred to stick with all their issues. I blame Fred for that.

# 17 September 2007 at 9:37 pm

Elizabeth said:

Lets see… an imaginary friend long ago named Missessa, a spider currently named Creeps, too many stuffed animals to name here (but they do all have names – some of the best being a dog named “Dirty” and a bear named “Lump-Bump”), a car named Baby Car, calcium supplements named “Calci-Chews,” a pen named “Flouncy,” a roomate named Lindsay (I guess that’s normal…), a ghost named Earl (long story), a chair named “Time Out”, too many boys named “Creepy Boy” to list individually, and a pumpkin named Simon.

# 17 September 2007 at 10:38 pm

delana said:

I had an imaginary friend growing up too. It’s name was Whoodee. Whoodee was blamed for EVERYTHING that went wrong in the house. Just like in Matt’s family – just blame it on Whoodee.

Or – maybe it was more me, as my name growing up was Dee. Maybe – alas – I am just now figuring this thing out. Maybe, my parents made Whoodee up. Who did that? Who Dee?

As for naming things – again – lack of creativity abounds. Nothing is named. Actually that would take up more grey matter than I care to use in trying to remember what name goes to what item.

Now – where is my flibbity-gibbit and where am I?

# 19 September 2007 at 12:34 pm